Confusing vs Responsibility

Peace upon on you..

very good day for all..

Nothing interesting want to share..

Just my own conflict..

Husy, I'm still doubt and confused to continue the way I was taking now..

I wonder why I chosed it?
is it the best choice for me??

Ya Allah, give me Your guiedance..
please show me the right way..

honestly i said, I'm still blur+confused+not confident+doubt++..and so on..

Yes, may be I 'm just need to follow..without choose..
since, I don't see the choice anymore..
other than I must choose it , enjoy it ang love it.

to enjoy something that not our willing,
it is something make me trouble, so difficult to do

I've tried to love ang enjoy it..
then i followed what I must to..

in the last


I think I got nothing
i had done something not with my heart..

I'm just do what people push me to do..
same like me in child
even in my secondary school....

so, what's difference of me??

If I study alot and grow up with the same input?
will I became an extraordinary output ??

output that can give something to myself,
to my religion, my parents, my friends, to people around me
and also to our ummah..

feel so useless..humble if I couln't give something for you all...
what's my sacrification? my contribution? my commitment??

I know, the answer is from mine...
but I don't have d answer yet...

so, should I continue this path??
it seem like I don't have chance to turn back..

whatever that will happen after this, I must face it..
I know, to reach the top, we must start from the bottom..

Hopefully, this is my best that Allah give..
if this is the best for me..
Ya Allah, please guide me..
help me..
give me a great strength to face all this..

"We are not always get what we like to, but we must learn how to like what we had got..."

only that we can be a grateful person. always thank to God what we have..

hmm..........

insyaAllah... i'll try it!!

if not because of You , I'm sure i will stop it..

I realised, this one sacrification that I can do to get Your Love..
please bless me Dear Allah..

seriously.., I'm tired.. to understand all this..
Please avoid me from give up..
show me the way..

I must change..
must be strong..
must be more mature
must be patient..
and the mot important
I must be honest on myself and YOU..

I must.......!!

"successful is not a destination, it is journey..."